Okay, Sorta Photo by Roberto Valdivia on Unsplash Yes, I’m Colombian. And when people find out I’m...
Funny
Going Commando with a Stained Apron
Broccoli, Baked Mayo, and the Breaking Points of Parenthood Photo by Pickled Stardust on Unsplash...
Okay, Take Two. And a Humble Brag.
Formally Announcing Unequivocally Ambiguous My wife, Justine, and our oldest daughter, Jovie, went...
Please, Stop!!!!
It’s not earwax, your kids just don’t want to hear it. Please, stop!!!!! I shouted at the...
A Post-Pandemic Matisse Pastoral
Of the Norovirus and Other Joys of Pietri Dish Parenting “I’d rather die on my feet than live on...
Buying Sushi in Dublin at Three in the Morning
I was in Dublin this last summer, and if you think Ireland is super Duper white, then you would be...
A Loogie on the Face
Fernando Londono was addressing Colombia’s congress when a Senator stood up, upset by the...
Video Performance: The Hair Brushing Vortex
I performed this story at the West Side Stories in Petaluma. It's based on an essay I wrote and...
You will never poop in peace again
I have only pulled my pants up without wiping once in my life. It was because I felt the big one...
The Stories We Tell To Help You Part With Your Money
Twice a year, the insurance company I worked for would get all its salespeople together to receive...
The phantom limb sensation of a $100 bill I’ve never owned
"People don't really want to be rich," I told myself as I looked around the empty conference room...
Money-Making Seminars Promised Me the American Dream
The stranger made a beeline toward my wife and me through the sea of Christmas shoppers drowning...
Recent Articles
Lost in ‘La Hijueputa’ Translation
Can Translation Ever Capture the Ineffability of Language Soul? Photo by Tania Mirón on Unsplash I sat down to watch the acclaimed “Griselda” on Netflix, and it felt so good to hear the Colombian...
Contracting the Womb’s Real Estate
A warm summer morning and the beginning of a home birth. (Home Birth: Part 1) Photo by Pineapple Supply Co. on Unsplash It was a warm summer morning; I was sleeping on the living room futon so I...
That Bimbo is Now My Wife. A-w-k-w-a-r-d!
Misunderstanding junk inside the language trunk Photo by Honey Yanibel Minaya Cruz on Unsplash “Even my uncle liked you,” I reassured Justine. She was my only guest at the party. I only walked on...